China Adoption

One year ago today, I began the long journey home from China with Miss
Katie in my arms to unite our family for the first time. One year ago on
the 16th, we first laid eyes on a quite little girl with soulful eyes
and a thumb embedded deep in her mouth. It was such a long journey from
the seed planned in 2004 to the first piece of paperwork started in 2006
to that day March 16th, 2009. It was a rough road full of obstacles but
we held on to our Pure Complete Faith and one year ago it was made
sight. And she was truly beautiful!

And she is even more beautiful today. Full of life. Full of
mischief. Full of love. Full of laughs. Smart, stubborn, and silly. She
was worth every minute of the wait and ever bump in the road.  Love you,
baby girl!

Then.

Now.

WooHoo! The great State of Tennessee recognizes that Kathleen Emma Xinxin has been adopted by Brian and Danielle, and that that adoption was full and final in the country of China.

Yes, this morning we appeared before the honorable judge who signed the degree saying it is so, and now we have the paperwork to prove it! :)

That's the question of the week it seems! Well, it's a bit of a complicated answer as you might expect. The short answer is it could be better, but it could be a LOT worse!

The biggest issue right now is sleep--or lack thereof.  Katie is still not on our time zone. I don't like to give kids benadryl for sleep but we are getting desperate. So last night a dose of benadryl got us sleep from 9- 12:30ish. Then she was up screaming in her crib wanting to play. Second dose of benadryl followed but she really fought the sleep. Holding her, rocking her, nothing worked, so we tried melatonin again... 10 mgs finally put her out at 3AM! She was up at 6 AM for the day! UGGGGGGG!!!

The second biggest issue is that I am not feeling well. I have some stomach thing going on. I get stomach cramps every time I eat... nothing else, just cramping. It's been going on for 48 hours now and my abdomen is actually sore to the touch! I'm really wanting to feel better! Uggggg!!

Things that are going well.... that would be just about everything else!

Katie is eating well. I found things she loves... oatmeal, scrambled eggs, Mimmi's egg noodles in chicken broth, yogurt, cheerios.

Things I can't get in her... fruit or veggies of any kind! That's what happens what you get a child at the age when they are least open to trying new foods.

Katie continues to have a happy personalty despite not sleeping. She loves Momma, but if not too tired will play with Daddy while I'm not of the room. She is always happy to see Momma! :) She likes her siblings. Loves to follow Evan and was SO excited to see Miriam this AM.

Miriam is handling having a sister well. She mostly seems nonchalant about it. But has been excited about having three "hers" in the house now. I think that already being a big sister has made this easy for her. She is a little protective of Evan, and at one point when Katie took Evan's toy, Miriam took it back for him!  LOL

Evan's adjustment... Wow. I am so proud of this little guy! He really has taken to his new role as big brother like a fish to water. He has such a big heart, and it really shows in his interactions with Katie. He loves on her with hugs, sniffs (don't ask!!), and pats. He shares his toys... even ones he really wants... with her. He likes to show her things and is even getting down and crawling with her. See pictures at end of post! :) Really he is being very gentle with her, but I still keep reminding him! More later.

We're back safe and sound at Westhaven!! Yay!! It's so good to be home! We were traveling a total of 33 hours, during which time Katie showed what a trouper she is and Momma got about 2.5 hours of sleep (not together).  We arrived at the airport 2.5 hours late due to a delay in Atlanta (imagine that!), so the kids didn't see me or meet Katie until this AM. They have done so well and I am so proud of all of them! I'm jet-lagged and out of it right now so I think a nap is in order! More later.

Good-bye, China, land of my daughter's birth! I carry away a rare gem, but I leave you a bit of my heart. Good-bye wonderful travel group!! You all have been so wonderful! Many thanks to you all... may our paths cross again!

Hang on family... Momma's on her way home! I can't wait to hold ALL of my babies in my arms!

This post is a back post that I actually meant to write last week, but was too busy. Since things are a little slower today, I thought I would write it.

On Wednesday, March 18th, we drove to LuoHe City to visit Katie's first home the SWI. This was a 2.5 hour drive that allowed us to see a bit of the Henan countryside. We saw a lot of greenery. There were many, many green fields of wheat growing. Our guide explained that wheat is the primary grain in Henan and the stable food is noodles from that wheat. We also drove past large vineyards near ZhengZhou and many fruit trees. The peach and pear trees were in bloom but there were others as well. We also saw what appeared to be "tree farms" or at least many rows of orderly trees. Actually, orderly would be the best description of the countryside in general. I had to look hard to see even one randomly growing plant! It was really very beautiful.

The people who farm this land live in little villages of 25 to a few hundred houses with the farmland surrounding them. These villages looked a lot like the village we saw near Beijing. The houses are all oriented the same direction. There would be one large building and 1-2 smaller buildings on the edges of a walled-in courtyard. There would also almost always be a large red gate/door that opened into the courtyard. The traditional style large building was usually taller then the buildings in Beijing, either 1.5 or 2 stories. There were also many "modern" style buildings with two stories. The most consistent thing about the villages was the construction everywhere! It seemed every home had some construction going on and if not, it was needed.

We also saw a lot of grave sites as we were driving. In Henan the graves are either next to the village or more commonly in the center of the family's fields. The graves have huge heaps of dirt on top and some are marked with a large stone tablet. Many graves also have an evergreen tree (or two) growing from the edge of them.

Here are some pictures of what we saw; they're not the best pictures since they were from a moving car!

Where did Momma and Katie eat?

Today after we got the all clear that our visa appointment went well, we headed out to enjoy a wonderful part of Chinese culture! The Chinese are very good at enjoying and using their public spaces together. It is something Americans could really learn from in my opinion. In the morning, the parks are full of people playing and exercising together. Huge groups play a form of hacky sack at all different skill levels from Grandmas to young men/boys. Women and couples dance all over. Music everywhere from groups playing instruments to larges groups singing. It's just really cool to watch it all.
It was a bit cooler today and the haze was decreased by the rain in the night so we had great views of the river and city. Overall a good day to be out and about!

So this AM we took the children to have their medical examinations for their US visas. We made quite a sight walking down the street at 9 AM today! As always, we turned a few heads! :) Once at the medical clinic, they did weight (22 pounds with clothing on), height, and temp. A doctor did a quick look over and listened to her heart & lungs, then the ENT doctor looked at her. Ears- clear, hearing- good, mouth.... she looked at Katie's mouth, she looked at the paperwork, she looked at Katie's mouth again, and then looked at the paperwork again. THEN she looks at me and said, "She does not have cleft palate. She has cleft gum." Thank you. That's exactly what I thought I saw in there!

It has become a tradition in the China Adoption community to take photos of the children on the red couches in the lobby of the White Swan hotel. So here is Katie, Katie & Momma, Katie and the 12 other children adopted last week, and our whole travel group!

A few pictures from the beautiful White Swan Hotel.

What do these two things have in common? Nothing besides they outline my day. We started the morning late since Katie and I didn't sleep too well. We got breakfast and were on time for our first group tour here in GZ. We went to the Six Banyan pagoda and temple where some families had a Buddhist blessing done (NO, I did NOT have my child "blessed".) By the way, I could feel the spiritual darkness... not the worst I've felt, but it was there.

After the temple, we visited the Guangdong folk arts museum. We also did a little shopping at a big store. On the way there we were pulled over by the traffic police (who aren't real police) and had to sit 15 minutes while they checked our driver! We got back to the hotel in time for a late lunch and nap. After nap, Katie and I checked out the hotel and grounds, and then it was time for visa photos, supper, and MORE shopping! I spent money today! :)

We're safe in GuangZhou tonight! We left ZhengZhou around noon, and while we had a lot of turbulence, Katie did great and slept most of the time. She did have a crying fit right after we landed though!

It is beautiful here, but hot.  I am very tired from the trip and stress of making sure everything goes well alone. We had supper at Lucy's. Boy, was it good! I'm going to go collapse now. :)

Our View:

Ok, this is a post I meant to write on Tuesday after we went shopping at the Lotus center (large superstore) here in ZhengZhou. I'll do it now while I have a minute. :)

So on Tuesday, after making the adoptions all official, our wonderful guides loaded us up and took us to the Lotus center. This was part shopping trip, part cultural outing.  Let me take a moment here to talk about shopping. Those of you packing at home right now, let me repeat what you have already heard. YOU CAN BUY ANYTHING YOU NEED IN CHINA!!  PACK LIGHTER!!! Seriously. Pack only the minimal clothing you need and a few supplies to get you through the first 48 hours. You can buy it all here. For those coming to ZhengZhou, Henan, especially using CCAI, know that the street behind your hotel (Crowne Plaza) is full of little shops that sell everything. You can very easily get there on Sunday evening before you get your child on Monday. (Otherwise, they will get you formula on Monday afternoon and take you to the Lotus center on Tuesday afternoon.)

When I say everything, I mean everything. I saw diapers, formula, baby wipes (FYI, Chinese baby wipes are not as high quality. Bring one pack and save them for nasty stuff!), diaper rash cream, Johnson & Johnson baby care items, Tide detergent, sippy cups, baby bottles, pacifiers, thermos (for hot bottles), toys, clothes, diet coke, TONS of snacks many recognizable, snickers bars, and the list goes on! This was JUST the little shops down the street! At the Lotus center there was even more. I will say the clothes at the Lotus didn't impress me. There was almost nothing that fit Katie (12 months/18 months) that was not split pants. Plan accordingly.

Now the cultural part. First, let me be very clear. For the most part the Chinese people have been wonderful! Many go out of their way to be helpful even if that doesn't feel "helpful" to us like pointing out that we are freezing our babies and they will get sick! :) Some have very sweetly thanked us for adopting our children and loving them. But that isn't the only reaction and the second reaction reminds us clearly WHY we are even able to adopt these sweet babies.  As some of you may know, the Chinese culture is a direct one in the sense that staring, pointing, and taking photos of complete strangers is not considered rude. I know this. I know that many here in ZhengZhou have barely seen a Caucasian let alone one carrying a Chinese child! Then take that times 13! What a sight we are! I don't mind their stares. I barely notice. Maybe because I've been part of a transracial family for 3.5 years or maybe because I spent 21 years sticking out of a crowd like a sore thumb.

What has surprised me is my response to the negative interactions. It is hard for me to ignore these and blow them off as Chinese culture. Let me give you an example of what I am talking about. While waiting for the bus at the Lotus center, a travel mate and I were standing and talking while holding our daughters. Both our sweet children are cleft-affected. Her little one is young and does not yet have her lip repaired. We quickly draw a crowd, but some are pointing at our children's lips and laughing. Some touch other sweet babies in our group and then see their special need and pull away in disgust. It makes me angry... angry for my child and sad... but it does shows me what she would face here if she stayed. 

I don't write this to made the Chinese culture/people look bad. I write it so others will not be shocked at the experience or the emotions they feel in response.

So today's outing was to the ZhengZhou zoo! I would personally have preferred visiting some place that actually represents Henan like the museum or the Yellow river but this is what the group wanted. The zoo was actually nicer then I expected for China, but some of the animals had it pretty rough. Then again a number had nicer living conditions then my daughter had so there ya go. Katie fell asleep in the sling after about 30 minutes so I'm not sure she saw too much. I think it was stimulus overload again! Poor baby.

Katie continues to do well and progress in attachment. This, of course, does not mean that all that progression is rosy. We had a 30 minute crying fit today, but that's progress just as surely as more talking and smiles are! We leave for Guangzhou tomorrow! Woohooo! :)

YAY!! Brian is home safe and sound at Westhaven. Unfortunately the poor guy is sick! He seems to have picked up whatever I had. :-( I, on the other hand, am feeling quite good thank you... although my stomach has been complaining just a touch.

Well, Katie is getting more and more comfortable with me. As I said before she woke up this AM all happy smiles and giggles. Previous mornings (and naps) she would awake and while not upset exactly, there was a "look" on her face that said, "Oh, it's not a bad dream."  This morning that look said, "It wasn't a dream!!! WOOHOO!"

So I've seen a lot more smiles, easy laughs, and happy babble. She has even offered me her snack! *faint* She wants me close, but as long as she isn't sleepy, she trust me to go to the bathroom by myself! ;-) Most of the good stuff happens in the room, but I did see a bit more while we were out today.

For our "trips" today, we went to the playroom in our hotel which Katie enjoyed. Then after nap, our group went to the local aquarium. It wasn't too bad... lots of fish I had never seen and lots of sea turtles. A nice little under-the-water-tunnel thing and a seal show. Not really worth the 80 rmb plus 60 rmb for the ride, but it did get me out of the hotel and we saw a little more of ZhengZhou. Katie enjoyed the seal show and even clapped. She was not as sure of the fish tanks... and since she doesn't quite trust me completely yet to keep her safe, she won't touch anything. Our last "trip" was to a Chinese restaurant across the parking lot from our hotel. It was fun, but since there weren't enough high chairs I had the challenge of holding a baby while feeding myself and her noodles using chopsticks! HA! That was a trip! :) Katie ended up helping herself to the noodle bowl with her hands since I couldn't very well stop her since she was so close to it. It was so funny... baby covered in noodles with noodles hanging out of her mouth and in both hands! I wish someone had had a camera along to get a pic! It was a riot! :)

The "bad" part of the children feeling more comfortable with their new parents is that they feel comfortable enough to test them and see where the limits are! It also doesn't help that there is NO discipline in the orphanage, nor do the Chinese appear to discipline young children at all. They seem to think a crying child should get what they want and if that is not possible (because of danger) they should get a treat (usually sweet food or candy). Little miss is no exception to this. She is used to throwing temper tantrums and getting food. But today she learned that Momma does not reward temper tantrums nor does she allow head throwing and back-arching.  She learned that, yes, Momma will gentle but firmly hold you upright. No, screaming will NOT change that. No, you still may not stick your finger in the electrical outlet and, NO, you will NOT get a treat because you are screaming! You're kid number three... I don't even hear screaming anymore! :)  I will say it was a bit disconcerting that momma's "unhappy" face and voice (along with "no" and redirection) about the electrical outlet incident only made little bit laugh. This one may give me a run for my money in the wills department!

Diaper Update: It appears that my lactose intolerance theory may be right on. No bottles today and no blowouts. She did have a loose stool this evening, but it didn't blow out. BTW, the other blowouts were THROUGH rubber pants!

So a bit more about our little girl!  We'll also do a "they said, we say" version. So here goes.  

They said: "She goes to bed at 8:30 pm and gets up at about 6:30 am. She takes a nap from 1:00-2:00 pm. She sleeps soundly."  Well, that's not much off. She DOES go to bed at 8:30 ish, but she sleeps until 7 most of the time and she also takes a longer nap then they said (2 hours, not one). Once she is asleep, she is out, but she is a VERY restless sleeper!

They said: "She sleeps in her own crib by herself on her back with a night light on. No need to rock her to sleep."
Um, not so much. She WILL sleep in her crib but doesn't care about a light. She does NOT sleep on her back and she LOVED to be rocked to sleep. Just because she learned that crying doesn't get you anything in the past doesn't make it still true.

They said: "She likes to takes baths."  HAAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAA! Now THAT'S a good one!! The child H.A.T.E.S. baths.

They said: "She has one BM everyday at about 10:00 am"  Ummm... No. She has a VERY nasty, watery BM 3-4 hours after every bottle. Which leads me to believe that she is likely lactose intolerant. We're going no bottle today to see what happens.

They said: "she hates take a car ride."  Actually, she doesn't mind at all.

They said: "She is extroverted and active; but she is a little afraid of strangers."  That part they got dead on! So far our family is three extroverts to two introverts. This also follows the gender lines in our family for those keeping score! :) Now that she is coming out of her grief shell, she is one active little girl. She will fit right in!

Actually, fit right in is the operative word. She loves music... hears a beat and starts bopping. And is already trying to clap out a rhythm. Which brings us to the question.. Can one be a Westhaven Kid and not be musical? She is a small whirlwind already. I have a pair of those at home, why not have a trio?  She babbles on and on... poor Evan will never get a word in again, I fear.  She loves to eat and giggle when tickled.... don't know anyone like that! ;-)  She sees a camera and IMMEDIATELY thinks you want a picture of her and turns on the cheese. Hummm... why are all the Westhaven girls a bit vain? :) She is a mischievous little imp just like her brother... goes to touch a "no no" looking over her shoulder to see what you will do!  LOL.  Food-wise she already thinks she is an American. She does NOT want Chinese food. Everything they said she eats/likes she spits out. Last night she sat on our bed and ate pizza. Seriously! :)

We had a very long day. We went to see Katie's SWI which is 2.5 hours away. Brian is now on his way home (hopefully safely on the ground in Beijing as I type this). I'm too tired to post more right now and little bit may be up in the night (she was last night) with the diaper from H. E. double hockey sticks so I'm going to bed. I figure I owe my few faithful readers out there about three posts now. I'll work on that in the AM. :)

She's ours forever!!! Yay!!

Seriously, I am the luckiest woman on the face of this earth! I have been give the three most wonderful children ever born to love and raise. Okay, so I'm a little bias, but I still feel rather unworthy when I consider it all! :)

Katie is about the cutest thing EVER! She is going to give her big brother and sister a run for their money and that's say a lot since they are both trophy winning members of the Cutie Club! So let me give you a run down of Katie Day!

We left the hotel at 8:50 sharp and walked about 10 minutes to the Henan office of Adoption Affairs. As we neared the door we could hear the babies crying. As family's walked in their babies were just handed to them. We realized very quickly that Katie was not there, and we were told the two LuoHe babies were running late. This was actually kind of nice because it gave us time to watch everyone else and we were also able to film Katie coming down the hall and someone else filmed for Brian during the actual hand off!  Just like her big sister, Katie didn't cry as she was handed to me. She was a bit anxious, but she has a brave little heart and the only outward sign was that she clung to me finger with her whole hand.  After we filled out the paperwork needed at that time, I put her in the Mei Ti and off we went. She settled in nicely and even gave her daddy a little smile for his silliness. (I think that makes 3 for 3, on Daddy getting the first smile!) Went we got her back to the room, I got her out of the three layers of clothes and the split bottom pants (at least she had a diaper on!)  She loved her stacking cups!! They were a major hit as were the fruit puff snacks.

A bit about her development and personality.  She has great fine motor skills, and can pick up very small items and transfer hand to hand. Gross motor is a bit behind. Her body feels like a much younger child, but in just 24 hours she is sitting better, crawling more, and pulling to stand (boy is she proud of herself for doing that!!)  She is trying to talk and I really think someone taught her "hi" and "bye". She is starting to realize that "Katie" is her and that "more" means more food is coming. :) She has laughed for us and will smile easily now.

Well, I had written almost twice this much about Katie's personality but some how I lost it and well... I'm way to tried and sick to re-write it so I'll post what I have. Maybe I will get back to it later.  Here is a picture until then.

T -25 minutes to baby Katie!!!! We are in the first group of families to get our children at 9 AM. We're excited and nervious!! And Danielle feels awful as a result of her allergies. Hoping and praying all goes well. Only a few more minutes baby girl!! Your life is going to change... and our hearts and arms will be a little more full!

HELLO ZhengZhou!!!

We flew out of Beijing this AM after realizing how blessed we have been the last few days to have such clear weather! The smog has settled in. *sigh* This seems to have really set off my allergies and sinuses... please pray for me that this doesn't get worse (I am very prone to sinus infections).

We are glad to be here in ZhengZhou and are preparing everything to recieve Katie at 9:00 AM tomorrow morning!!! (That's 9 PM Sunday night for those on Eastern Daylight Time.) Our hotel is lovely and we had a great meal tonight following a walk around the city "block" to find some water and other supplies. This is a great place and I like it much better then Beijing (not that I disliked BJ).

Now I better get all the paperwork and gifts in order!

We started out early again, but ditched our travel group for the day even though we like them! :)  Grandpa George and our dear friends Nathan and Portia along with their children E, A, and I took the night train to Beijing to come see us!! They arrived at the hotel at 8:30 AM with a driver to take us around. I can't tell you how good it was to see them!

We headed out to see the Great Wall which was about an hour away. We went to a part of the wall that is not as touristy as the section slightly closer to Beijing.  We rode a cable car up the mountain to get to the wall which in and of it's self was fun. We then walked along the wall going through three guard towers... might have done more but the little girls were tired and ready for lunch. I kept thinking, "I can't believe I'm standing on the Great Wall!!" On the walk back, Nathan and Portia helped us get some great deals on some items.

We then drove back toward Beijing stopping at a small restaurant for lunch. We walked in past a rather inebriated group of Chinese men. Nathan ordered for us. Good thing he can speak Mandarin, because I really don't think anyone there knew English! :) The food was wonderful! I liked everything and even Brian found a number of dishes to enjoy. The hardest part was using chopsticks, there was no other option! The other fun thing was eat right off the serving plates instead of using spoons to serve the food on to individual plates first. Overall a great lunch, and an even better cultural experience!

From there we drove over two hours to the south side of Beijing (actually out in to the country but they still call it Beijing).  This is where New Day Foster Home is located. A friend of Nathan and Portia's gave us a tour, and it was wonderful to see it in person after following the blog for almost four years. We also visited the little gift shop there and spent way too much money! LOL

Nathan then took us for a walk through the village, home to 10,000 people (yes, still a village in China). What an experience. It was obvious we were seeing the real China, not some glossy, carefully presented version, but the real country as experienced by many of China's 1.4 billion people. This particular village relies heavily on agriculture and that was evident in many parts of it. After this tour, we finished off the evening at a local restaurant before driving back to our hotel in Beijing. What a great day!! :)

More photos here.

More photos from Day One here.

We had a huge day today touring Beijing. We started early this morning with breakfast at our hotel and met up with our travel group at 8:30 sharp. There are 12 families in the group, and they are a great bunch.

First we drove about 10 minutes to Tiananmen Square where we got out into the biting cold wind and begin to walk. (A number of us were nowhere near prepared for how cold it was!! I was and even so, about froze my legs off!)  We could only walk past the square as there was a special meeting in the Great Hall of the People so we were not allowed to walk in the actual square.  We then entered the Forbidden City passing under the large photo of Mao. The Forbidden City and Imperial Palace were huge. We walked all the way through and even stopped a few places at little museums. I found the buildings there to be stunning with a lot of beautiful detail work. 

After leaving there we went for a traditional Chinese lunch which was quite good right down to the young lady who did a traditional dance for us.  Then it was on to the silk factory demonstration. Too bad the silk dresses where too expensive to get a child and too small for me!! They sure were pretty! :)  We then drove to an older district in Beijing known as the Hutong neighborhoods. There we toured the neighborhood via rickshaws because of the very narrow road ways that are more like small alleys. We were even invited in to one of the homes there and were able to talk with the resident. It was interesting to hear her rather negative take on the cultural revolution.

After this, it on to a pottery demonstration museum. Talk about beautiful stuff!! After that we were given a short break for supper on our own; then it was off again. This time we went to see an acrobatics show. Brian was so tired he was falling asleep, but it was a very beautiful and interesting show! All in all a very exciting and packed day!! I'll try to post some pictures as soon as I can.. having a little trouble here with that

We're here! It's midnight in Beijing... we are exhausted... 30 hours of flight behind us... big day ahead of us tomorrow! Good night from Beijing!!

We're under 12 hours to take off!! WOOHOO!! I am DONE with everything. Brian is still scrambling, but he had to work today. Mimmi is here... the kids are going crazy! :) Emotionally I'm still doing ok, but I'm not thinking about leaving the kids. I know that they will be fine. They adore Mimmi and, well, she's a great Grandma. Miriam is extra clingy so that doesn't help. But I know they will be fine.

A few prayer requests for those of you who are so inclined.
Please pray for safe travel for us. That our planes will be on time and that everything will go smoothly. That my back will not be negatively effected. No lost luggage, etc.
Please pray for Katie, that she will have peace and a brave heart as she is ripped from all she has ever known by two pale, big nosed, crazy talking people.  That she will quickly realize that we have her best interest at heart. That she will quickly come to love us as much as we already love her.
Please pray for Miriam and Evan that they will not be too upset by the absence of Momma and Daddy. That their hearts will be open to their new little sister. That they will stay healthy and obey Mimmi.
Please pray for our health as we travel and also Katie's health.
Please pray for our travel group (there are at least ten families). That there will be positive relationships built.
Please pray for Danielle as I finish the trip alone. That I will be strong and be able to care for Katie and myself alone.

We hope to update both this blog and facebook so stay tuned for our big adventure!!! Here we come Katie girl!!

We're under 48 hours to take off! Yay!! Mimmi comes tomorrow and I'm getting the last minute things in place. Here is our itinerary. Honestly it's still not quite real to me, but it will be soon! :)

March 11th: Flight to China via Detroit and Tokyo arriving in Beijing at 9:50 PM on the 12th

March 13th- tour with travel group

March 14th- meet up with friends and do some more touring including visit New Day Foster Home

March 15th- Flight to ZhengZhou

March 16th- KATIE DAY!!! 

March 17th- finalize adoption

March 18th- tour/maybe visit SWI, Brian leaves for home in evening

March 19-20th- hang out in ZhengZhou

March 21st- leaving for GuangZhou  

March 22nd- free day

March 23rd-25th- do things to get Katie's US visa

March 26th- Flight to US arrive at 11:38 PM!!

***UPDATE*** This post has been updated to reflect my thoughts after travel!

After going over and over other people's packing lists, I figure I should pay-it-forward and post mine. To be quite fair, I have actually added a little more to this since we were so underweight. For example, I'm taking more meds and a extra shirt for each of us.

T - 2.5 days to leaving, T -7.5 days to Katie Day!!

The LIST!!

***Over all very happy with the clothes I packed. See notes ***

Clothes For Danielle (colors:blue/black)
1 pair walking shoes (wear)
1 pair of saddles  *Almost didn't take these, SO Glad I did!*                                                                                                   
5 pair underwear   (wear one)
5 pair white socks   (wear one) *could have been less, but they are so small, I wouldn't chnage this*
2 white bras (wear one)
2 pair blue jeans   (wear one)
1 Skirt
1 pair black capris *Again almost didn't take, glad I did, GuangZhou is HOT even in MArch!* 
1 short sleeve t-shirt
1 long sleeve t-shirts (double as PJ's)  
1 set long underwear (pants only, double as PJ's) *VERY glad to have in Beijing*
1 pair sweats (double as PJ's)
2 long sleeve shirts (wear one)
2 short sleeve shirt *I ended up taking 3 which was nice, but I could ahve make it with 2*
1 sweatshirt (wear)
1 light jacket for rain   (Colt’s jacket)
1 winter coat (wear) * NEEDED in Beijing*
watch with alarm (wear)
Clothes For Brian
1 pair of shoes (wear)
5 pair underwear   (wear one)
5 pair white socks   (wear one)
2 pair blue jeans   (wear one)
2 short sleeve t-shirt
 
2 long sleeve t-shirts (wear)
1 sleep shorts
2 shirts
1 winter coat (wear)
1 sweatshirt/sweater
Clothes For Katie (colors: pink/match pink)
6 pair baby socks   (pink/white mix)
6 onsies (2 long sleeve)
3 pair thighs *only used once*
2 outfits plus 1 top, size 12 months
2 outfits plus 1 top, size 18 months
4 PJ's 12/18 months (same double as outfits)
1 sweater (12 months)
1 lightweight jacket (18 months)
1 winter coat (18 months)
1 cloth bib
1 vinyl pocket bib
1 pair soft shoes *didn't fit, too big*

***Katie's clothes all fit except the shoes. I bought shoes there and also one outfit. I washed her clothes in the sink, having pants and onesies that could mix and match was a much!!
*Toiletries: Danielle *
sanitary items
1 razor
1 small hair brush
1 hair clip
pony tail holder (wear)
travel size high quality lotion
chap stick
*Toiletries: Brian*
Shampoo (travel size)
Soap (small)
Electric razor
Hair brush
Glasses
Contact solution
* Baby care items *
15 Diapers
diaper rash cream
2 pair plastic pants
1 pack wipes in ziplock bags (divided)
1 portable changing pad
travel size good quality lotion
travel size baby wash/shampoo  
2 small soft blankets
small amount cheerios (inside other stuff)
1 small bag rice cereal
1 bag formula
1 bottle & 30 liners
2 nipples for bottle
1 sippy cup
2 baby spoons
2 small plastic bowls with lids
slings x 2
cloth backpack diaper bag
1 inflatable ball
Plastic stacking cups
Sleepy Kitty
Fingernail clipper
Med dropper/spoon
Bulb syringe
6 safety pins
*First Aid Kit*
Tweezers
bandaids 
triple antibiotic cream
hydrocortisone cream
*Medications Danielle & Brian*
Vitamins & herbs 
Tylenol
Advil
Pepcid (enough for each day- Dani)
Claritin OTC (enough for every day- Dani)
Sudafed PE 
Cough medicine
Cough drops/ lozenges
Dayquel (tabs)
Imodium & pepto tabs (enough to take 2x a day)
Melatonin
Benadryl (tabs)
Antibiotic (Dani)
Dyflucan (Dani)
Brian’s meds
* Medications Katie *
Baby Tylenol Cold or cough med
Baby Tylenol
Baby Motrin
Saline spray
prescription diaper rash cream
Lotrimin AF
Teething gel
Powder Pedialyte packs
Gel suppositories
Phenergan suppositories
Children's Benadryl
Earache med
* Electronics *
Computer (charger and cords)
Camera
Video camera (charger & cords)
extra memory cards
extra batteries
battery charger
jump drive
Ethernet cables
a power strip
a converter & adaptor (may not need)
iPod shuffle
*Miscellaneous*
2 Nalgene bottles
single serving packets of ice tea mix and lemonade mix
Trail Mix (small amount)
Few snack bars
6 Red gift bags & 6 red envelopes
6 sheets red tissue paper
6 gifts (cosmetics sets)
1 lightweight, collapsible dufflebag (green one)
Small calculator
6 mini kleenex packs
1 small purell bottle & travel purell pump
roll small, scented trash bags
Tide pen
Febreeze spray in the travel size bottle
Small bottle of dish soap
Small bottle of tide
Travel Lysol spray
small scissors
A few clothes pins for in-room washing
1 6’ clothesline
little flat LCD flashlight
travel duct tape
1 box ziplock gallon-size bags
1 box ziplock quart-size bags
2 sets plastic wear
rubber bands
2 small baby wash clothes
black pen
vinyl gloves
2 books
2 travel neck pillows
*Luggage*
Money belt x2
Large rolling bag
Large rolling duffle
Green duffle (packed)
Cloth diaper bag (packed)
Backpack
Small suitcase (carry-on)

Well, I have finished spring cleaning the house! WOOHOO! It was really dirty behind the couch... sssssh! Don't tell anyone! kay?

I have also completed the dry run packing. Weight limits for in China flights are tight... even though we are allowed two 50 pound bags each on the trip over, once in China, we get one 44 pound bag each! We also get one carry-on each. As you can imagine, this limits packing a bit. First, I packed everything that I know I'll be sending back with Brian... that came in under 25 pounds! Woohoo! Then I packed everything as I want to have it for the trip over. Bag one, a rolling duffel, came in at 40 pounds!! Bag two, a standard rolling bag, came in at 30 pounds!!!! I still have a few items to pack, but they aren't even close to 5 pounds total.... besides between 10-15 pounds is donations/stuff for our friends which we will get rid of in Beijing! Ok, I'm really proud of myself! I guess the two months of obsessing over my packing list have paid off!

 T -4 days to leaving... T -9 days until Katie-Day!!

This weekend I worked on the food angle. We now have a 10 week menu planned as well as detailed plans for the 17 days I will be gone.  There are 32 meals prepared and frozen in the freezer including those numbered for use the days I am gone. Yup, I'm pretty happy with myself. Now on to this week's mission... clean the house!  T- 9 days and counting!!

We have our CA (consulate appointment) March 25th! This means we are ON for travel March 11th. WOOOHOOO, baby girl, Momma is coming!! Now to buy those plane tickets!!

We got TA (travel approval) today!!! WooHoo!! Our agency is requesting our CA (consulate appointment) and assuming they get the one they are asking for we will definitely be traveling on March 11th.

What nice news to receive on the day Katie turns 15 months!! We will Have her in our arms in a little over three weeks! Double woohoo!! 

Our agency called today to make sure we have everything in order and to see if we have any travel questions. They told us they expect TA (travel approval) this Friday or Monday. They told us that they will had to divide our group of families, because there are so many. This is sad because the families have started bonding and some of my online friends are in a different group from our family. We are in the second group to go. And, if nothing changes, we will be leaving March 11th! Yay! We will have Katie in our arms before she turns 16 months old. While I would love to have Katie a week earlier and travel with my friends, the really good thing about later travel is that we will get to see our friends N & P who live in China! They plan to met us in Beijing and if we were traveling the 4th, they wouldn't be able to.

Now I really need to get busy!!

Praise God we received an update on our little Katie today! I'm so happy. We learned she is 28 inches tall which is 10th percentile on the US (!) charts. She is reported to weigh in at 23 pounds, but I wonder if they are weighing her with all her clothes on. If not, that puts her at 60th percentile on the US charts! Big girl, especially for being a cleft affected kid in an orphanage. Many other little ones have not fared nearly as well!

But the best part of all is that a recent traveler was able to get pictures. And the very best part?? She is SMILING!! Such a sweet little smile it is too!

Yay! Just got the email that our travel visas are on their way back to us! Now if we could just get that pesky Travel Approval....

Not much going on here... just waiting. Waiting on visa's which should arrive midweek next week. Waiting on travel approval... hopefully that will be here by next Friday. I'm finding to hard to get motivated to do the stuff I need to do as a result. I need to clean my house well and put up 2 months of frozen meals, but no motivation here. :)

I'll leave you with a few Miriam-isms.
Heard a lot lately. "Oh no, what are we gon'ah do now?"
Heard when she wants to cuddle with me. "I want to be hers with you."  Apparently when we are apart we are not "hers".

Oh, there is one piece of posible good news. Hopefully by Tuesday we will have a new picture of our baby girl. Another family is traveling to pick up their son at her SWI and will ask to see her and get pictures. *fingers crossed*

The question burning on everyone's mind.... "When will you travel?" Well, we still don't really know. We are still waiting on TA (travel approval) and the earliest I expect that is the week of Feb 16th. Once we have TA, the window of travel will narrow but still can not be confirmed..... we need CA (consulate appointment) for that! CA will tell us when we can come to the US Consulate in China to get Katie's visa to travel here... everything has to be planned around that appointment. So we wait.

In other travel news, we learned last week that Aunt Kristin who was to travel with me will not be able to. While we wish she could, the very good news is that we re-thought Brian's traveling! Now Brian will be traveling for the first part of the trip and will be there when Katie joins our family! There are a number of positives in this not the least of which is that this will make Katie a US citizen when her little feet touch US soil. Believe me, the less you have to deal with the US Office of Immigration, the better for you!  Of course, I have to admit that I am also excited about the prospect of 3 days with Brian without a kid in tow for the first time in over 3 years!

In other adoption news, we are moving right along with packing and planning and getting ready. I need to go over the paperwork again, but now that Brian is traveling there is nothing really to do that I haven't done. My various "To Do" lists are down to only 2 lists and one has only 2-3 things left on it. My packing list is revised and complete (Brian's traveling makes packing A LOT easier!) I have already started packing... Katie's stuff is 95% packed or at least stacked together by the suitcase. Really, packing is one of those things I am very good at if I do say so myself! :)

We had a "Travel Conference Call" with our agency on Tuesday. Not really anything new, but there were 21 families on this call!! We learned that our agency is considering splitting up the group of us who will be going to Henan. I really hope not, but whatever happens, happens!

We are so blessed to get a new picture of Katie yesterday! It is only two days (or so) old, and is the best quality to date. I'm not going to post it publically on here because we have not been told offically that it *is* Katie. But let me just tell you what a balm to my Momma's heart that picture is! She is so beautiful. She looks happier then before and still healthy and well taken care of. AND, she has HAIR!! Oh, and she is so cute.... so very cute. In the words of her Jie Jie (big sister) this morning, "Momma, I want to go get baby Katie NOW!!" Me, too, Miriam, me, too.

Update: Here is that picture!

Praise God we got our “Letter Seeking Confirmation of Adopter”  (also known as the LOA) today!! What does this mean? This means that China looked at all our paperwork and all of Katie's paperwork. This means that they have matched it all together. This means that we will travel to get Katie in 5-8 weeks.

AHHHHHHHHHHH!! Did I say we are traveling in 5-8 weeks??!??? AHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I have WAY to much to do!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

It is with the greatest joy that we present our new daughter. Kathleen Emma Xinxin was born November 19th, 2007 which makes her 13 months old. This also makes her 17 months younger than Evan and 29 months younger than Miriam. She is from Luohe, Henan province, China. She was born with a Cleft lip (repaired) and palate. We don't know much about her, but she is said to be quiet with a ready smile and loves music. Let me tell you about her new name. Kathleen is my middle name and is for my grandmother Katie. Emma is a name we liked. Xinxin is Mandarin and means "faith". All together her new name means "Pure complete Faith".
We hope to travel to China in 3-4 months. Here are two pictures of our littlest sweetheart!

I am trilled to anounce we have PA! I want to write a proper post but I'm on the cellphone for internet. I'll tell you all about our baby girl very soon!

While I'm still thinking about it, I wanted to share something that happened on Dec 7th.  The week of Thanksgiving was a VERY rough emotional week for me. Truly, what you read on this blog does not do it justice. The week following was slightly better, but still far from easy. So it was in a state of emotional angst that I found myself sitting in church the morning of Dec 7th. As I sat there struggling with my fears and anxieties, my loving Father sent me a sign in the form of a little red ladybug. For those who don't know, the ladybug has been adopted by the Chinese adoption community as a good luck charm, and it is said that people see ladybugs before referrals are sent from China. So there I sat in my dark little corner, half-heartedly listening to the songs and words around me, telling God all about how I was feeling. All of a sudden, I realized that I was staring at a ladybug slowly wondering her way around the collar of the man sitting in front of me. A ladybug, in the cold of December, in a church building inches from me. As I looked at it, I knew it was a sign sent for me. And in a moment I knew it's message. No, there was no voice, but I felt the whisper to my soul. It was simply "PEACE".

Yippie!!! We just got the word. Our Letter of Intent to adopt (LOI) has been logged in to the system in China. So, we are officailly LOI 12/12/08! Step one complete! Now we wait for pre-approvel (PA). The agency has sent me MORE paperwork to do!! ACK! I'm so sick of paperwork! But at least now I know WHO all this paperwork is for! :)

On a lighter note, Miriam ask tonight "When are you going to get baby Katie so you can hold her?" When people ask her if she is getting a little sister, she says, "Yes, and Evan is (getting one) too!"  Yup, she is a good big sister!

And that's all I can say right now!

I seek my happiness in the Lord, and he gives me my heart's desire! Psalm 37:4

The Lord is good; for His mercy, tender kindness and syeadfast love endure forever. Jeremiah 33:11

Well, today marks 23 months since we turned in our paperwork to our agency and begin waiting for a referral. Not counting the time we were on hold due to Brian's job loss, we have now waited 16 months. That is one of the longest waits ever with our agency. Things are not looking good for us to even see our child's face before Christmas.

I'm actually doing better than I thought I might. I've been busy organizing our church's Christmas gifts for children who won't be getting much this year. And like they say, the best way to forget your own sorrows is to help someone else.

China's orphanage "donation" fee has been raised to 35,000 yaun effective Jan 1st, 2009. Which means we will now have to come up with between $2,000-2,100 more then we expected. Sigh.

In case anyone is wondering, I'm still here.  I've written a few posts lately that haven't been publish or that I removed after a short while mainly because they are uncensored and dark... and I don't know that I want that out in public.

Anyway, yesterday marked 2 months since we took our file off hold. I can not believe we are still waiting after 2 months. I never expected that.  Next Tuesday marks 23 months that we have been waiting for our referral. Unbelievable. I never expected to type such a crazy thing! Next Thursday marks TWO YEARS since our dossier was logged in in the Non-special needs line in China. Had we intended to adopt a non-special needs child, I would not be surprised by this at all.... but that was never our intent. It is inconceivable to me that not only is my daughter not home in my arms, but I have yet to even see her face!! Talk about unmet expectations. Talk about shattered hopes. Talk about unfulfilled dreams.

There are some lies that adoptive parents feed themselves and each other. One of them is that once you have your referral (or child) you forget all about the wait. Maybe that is true for some, but that is not my truth and I think if more were honest they would admit it's not true for them either. I think the truth is more like a bad labor and delivery experience. You never forget, but with time enough of the worst fades so that your desire for another child overpowers your painful memories and you're willing to try again hoping that "this time it will be different".  There are other lies, but I don't want to get burned at the stake today so I'll keep my thoughts to myself.

One thing I've really come to see in this journey is that it is ALL about expectations. As long as you have not waited longer than you expected, waiting isn't hard (at least not REALLY hard), but the hour you go over what you expect, all bets are off. The wait becomes more than hard.... it becomes painful to a degree I can not even describe. So truly it is not about how long you have waited, but if you waited longer than you expected to.  

I am so tired of roadblocks in this adoption. I am so tried of things going wrong. WHY is no one competent? WHY does everything have to be so hard????? I just want my baby!!!  Is that REALLY so much to ask??

I have learned that the child we were unable to accept has a family. I am very happy for both the child and the family.

First a big thank you to all who have been so encouraging and have kept us in your thoughts and prayers. I'm doing ok... mostly. The right thing isn't always easy and it doesn't always *feel* right. So while I know we made the right decision I still feel really sad sometimes too.

However, I am very thankful for the two beautiful children I have. They are so sweet and WAY too cute, not that I'm bias or anything!  So in their honor a few recent funnies:

Momma was busy raking up leaves and Miriam was busy trying to play in them. A frustrated Miriam ask, "Momma, can you play somewhere else please?"

Miriam during a recent infestation of gnats: "Momma, I'm going to use the 'fly water' to hit the flies!"

I've been MIA recently with very good reason. First, I was really struggling with The Wait as illustrated by my last post.  I really didn't want to subject the blogsphere to my whining, but I also really had nothing else to say, nor did I feel much like writing anyway.

Emotionally, this has been an extremely hard week. The Wait had me in a bad place and then the USCIS struck *again*. Monday we received a letter requesting yet MORE info and an addendum to the freakin' addendum because our social work left out ONE word that was implied by everything else!! Seriously, I think they have it in for us! Our poor social worker is about ready to hurt them, but I *think* that will be taken care of soon.

Then it came. The Call. "A possible match. A child for your family. Are you interested? " "YES, YES, 100x YES!!!"
But as I watched the photos load on my email, I knew this child had a condition not listed in the file, one far more severe. So begin the emotional race to confirm with our doctor my suspicion and to try to research what this new diagnosis would mean for this child and our family. The answer: no way to know for sure until the child is here the true severity. Certainly years and years of therapy (some of them daily), possible surgeries, and no certainty of outcome. I have no doubt that this child will make a wonderful addition to some family. However with much soul searching we do not feel that we are the best family for this little one due to already have two young children in our home. We do not think it would be fair to this little one or to Miriam and Evan. So this AM, I made the difficult call to our agency.

All that said, this was a very hard decision and I write about it in part so that others who walk this road will know they are not alone. I doubted myself. We had always believed whatever referral God sent we would accept, certainly that is what we would do if we gave birth to this child. I looked at the pictures and did not see my child. But was that just my selfishness? Was that just me not wanting a child who would require SO much time and energy and change to our family life? Was God trying to tell me to stretch in a different direction than I had planned? Certainly, I felt for this child. I want this child to have a family. To have medical care and therapy. To be able to reach their full potential. It was so hard.

Finally, Brian said that if I was really convicted that this was what God wanted he was game, but otherwise he didn't think we were the best family. Then I realized that I felt different about this child than I did when I saw Miriam and Evan's referrals. With Miriam, I knew she was mine for the moment the phone rang. Never a doubt, never a question. With Evan, we were not even looking for his adoption... he was our miracle, fall-in-your-lap, never-happens-that-way adoption. I didn't *know* when I saw Evan's pictures and info that he WAS my son. But he pulled at my heart in a way this little one did not. And perhaps more importantly, I was ready for anything with Evan. We were told that he had been evaluated as mildly cognitively delayed, severely speech delayed, and severely physically delayed. But I KNEW without a doubt that he was fine and even if he wasn't, I KNEW we would be ok. I did not feel that with this little one.

But WHY would God send us this file? That question continued to bug me. This morning I received two possible answers.

1. I am perhaps the only waiting parent with our agency who could have looked at that photo and IMMEDIATELY knew the correct diagnosis.  I'm not sure our wonderful doctor would have known right away if I hadn't pointed her in the right direction (this is a very rare condition, one she has never even seen). How *I* came to be able to recognize it is completely a God thing. So perhaps we got this referral so that the correct diagnosis could be identified and our agency can find a family who is ready for that diagnosis. Perhaps we saved another family from the REAL pain of falling in love with this child and THEN learning the truth and having to say no. Or even worse, disrupting the adoption in China when they saw the truth.
2. Perhaps this is yet again God's way of buying time so our little one can make her way to our agency. I don't know. All I know is we are still looking for our little XinXin. Hang on baby, Momma is looking for you!

Another Friday come and gone, and other week is history without my phone ringing... well at least without it ringing with the *right* phone call. 22 months of waiting, and I'm really starting to feel it. I fear my patience is limited. Too much longer and I'm going to need a padded room.....

What a crazy week this has been. Saturday we had a get together with our local Guatemala Adoption group at the park.  It was a small group this time, but nice to see everyone.

Then Sunday I got sick. Really fast. With flu like symptoms; sore throat, head ache, fever, chills, aches. UGGGGG. Monday was NOT fun. I was hitting the Tylenol trying to stay ahead of the fever long enough to keep up with the kids. Lets just say I heart PBS!!  But even an unending supply of TV didn't tempt my crazy duo for long and by 11 they were wreaking the house while I lay on the couch under blankets.  Thank God they still take naps!  But I'm better now except for a nagging sore throat when I eat certain things.

Today is a good day in another way. Today our adoption is OFF HOLD!! WOOOHOO!! Really, I wasn't sure it would ever happen, but it has. Now we get to wait again but this time it is for a referral; at least we are back in line. :)

Multiple answered prayers to report tonight. First, little Susannah is much better and on her way to the US with her new family!! What a miracle!!  Second, Brian FINALLY has a job offer, he is still negotiating, but hopefully we will have something signed in the next week! Whooohooo!

I have been following the blog of a wonderful family on their journey to their daughter who is a special needs child in China.  They are in China right now at her bedside in a horrible hospital.  They desperately need all of our prayers... they desperately need a miracle to save her life.  China has not given the family legal custody and without it they can not demand that the little girl be transferred to a hospital that can actually help her.  This is a God size task! Please pray for strength for the family especially Leslie, the mother. And pray for Susannah, the little girl.

Brian has a job interview today.  If he gets this position, we will have benefits again.  Which means we can come off of hold with our adoption agency.... and this adoption MAY happen someday.

At last, after the big fiasco of last month, we got our I-171H approval today! Yea! So we're in the clear for 18 more months before we have to file again. (Please God, don't let us have to file again!)

Seriously, I think our local office has nothing better to do then to see what issues they can cause families! We filled everything in Feb to renew our I-171H and FIANLLY today we get a letter from them. BUT, of course, it could not be the new I-171H. Oh, no, of course not! They want more info. On what you ask?

Our agency reports:

"The CCAA has finished the review of the adoption application documents
      registered with our office before December 31, 2006."

YES!!!  Thank you, God! This means that China has look at all the paperwork we submitted Dec 11th, 2006 and has approved us!! I haven't been this happy about this adoption in a LONG time!!

Conversation with Miriam last week.

Miriam: "Who this?" (points to self)

Mommy: "Miriam?"

Miriam: "No!  I Sissy! That's Brother." (points to Evan)

Mommy: "That's right Miriam.  Evan is your little brother and you are his big sister."

Mommy: "Do you want a little sister?"

Miriam: (pause) "Not really." 

We have just returned from a week long trip to see Mimmi and also saw Grandma W. for a few hours.  The kids had a great time, although Evan missed his Daddy as always.  Evan was actually a bit mad at Daddy when he first showed up again.  I'll post pictures later...

Well, at least our fingerprints are in the USCIS system again.  We drove to Charlotte NC today and were re-fingerprinted.  It went very well and I must say I like the Charlotte office a lot.  We were in and out in 20 minutes ... it would have been 15, but we had to take turns to watch the kids.  Now that that is done we have done everything we need to do to update our paperwork.  Just sit back and wait, and wait, and wait some more!

I found a couple of You-tube videos of Amanda de Lange from Chinese Starfish. I wrote about her blog here.

Interview with Amanda: Part I

Interview with Amanda: Part II

WOW! WOW!

An online friend, Erin of Full House, Full hands, Full Heart, has a new job as HIV adoption Coordinator for her agency. This morning she reported that her agency had persuaded China (Yes, CHINA!) to "try" placing HIV+ children. This is SO huge. Please read her post copied below and SPREAD THE WORD!

For those wondering... Yes, we are still adopting from China... someday... God willing...

Seriously, the wait times are crazy, and we really do not know when it will happen.  Right now we are updating all our paperwork, because besides the changes (Evan's adoption), all the paperwork expires every 18 months.  I am reminded how much I hate paperwork. 

The follow letter from Amy Eldridge, founder of Love Without Boundaries, has been posted on a number of forums and lists that I visit. It is a real tear jerker... I think I'll let it speak for it's self.

I thought from time to time I will talk a little bit about some of the blogs that I read.

First up there is Chinese Starfish.
This is the blog of a South African woman living in China running a foster home for children with special needs. Her story is interesting, heartwarming, sad, and a powerful testimony to the good still in this world.

I love reading this blog for so many reasons. It gives me a look into the culture of my future daughter. It allows me to feel a connection to real children in China. But perhaps the biggest thing is that, if I were single, I would love to to be doing exactly what Amanda is.